It's the 2nd week already.
Most people have their breast flowing with milk like a factory and you have only 30ml in total from the pumps.
You feel like a loser. You are not doing enough for your baby. You are a lousy Mother!
- You are doing it wrongly and every women have breast milk -
I'm not talking about the "colostroum" <- i don't know how to spell.
I'm taking about MILK!
Here are some common problems faced by Mummy is you have no breast milk or very little breast milk.
Breast milk is a mental stimulation process of supply and demand.
If you keep supplementing with formula, your breast milk's quantity remains low.
- Ask yourself. Why are you supplementing with formula? -
If the answer is - because i tried and tried but the baby is hungry and crying.
Then go ahead, throw in 30ml of formula (In the senario of first - second week after birth)
If the answer is - i'm tired from waking up at night every 45mins - 1hour.
Then go ahead, throw your breast pump away. You will never have breast milk.
Like mention, supply and demand. Your brain will stop producing milk at night, cause there is no suckleling.
How do i know? Well, that's what happen to my wife. We wanted the baby to sleep well at night so we gave 100% formula during the night. So her breast milk quantity remains at 60 - 90ml.
Impossible to feed 2 babies.
Also, this is confirmed by the lactationist <- don't know how to spell also.
More then just simple commitment to allow the baby to suckle as and when he/she wants, there is also a problem of stress.
Is someone in your family saying "Give them some formula la, you don't have milk, they are hungry."
If there is, you will get stress and stress does not help in generating milk.
This is where the husband come in.
Encourage your wife. Do whatever to make her believe she is doing well.
For myself. I do the stupid "snap my fingers" and as though magic, i "hypnotise" my wife and tell her that she have a lot of milk, she is a milk factory.
Stupid? Yes. Effective? Very.
She is now more positive and tries very hard to feed throughout the day.
Everyone's happy.
Also, try to give her proof that she is doing well.
Take a record of feeding time of formula milk. If the baby feeds on breast milk for 6hours, show it to her. Tell her she's done a great job and the baby sleeps an hour or so after feeding and have not had any formula for the last 6hours!
Be hyper! Be excited. Be more excited then her.
Bring the baby to her when the baby cries, pour her a cup of warm water after she's done.
Tell her the baby loves her for giving him/her milk.
It's all in the mind.
It's a bonding process not only for Mummy and Baby, but for Daddy too.
Com'on Dad! Do your part!
You can save tons of money for not buying milk powder too you know!
Do it!
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Issues - Different Practises = Arguements
Life was so peaceful before the baby arrive.
You and your wife goes on night drives, visit the toy store on weekends and hug and cuddle each other while feeling the baby kick in her tummy.
- Face the facts, those time are over -
Usually it is never the parents who argue over how to do things.
If you read my earlier posts, both Daddy and Mummy should attend parentcraft, so both your thinking should be rather standard.
BUT HEY!
How about the grandparents? I am pretty sure both families will practise different ways of raising kids. So who should you listen to? Which technique should you adopt?
Usually i recommend that you take the technique of the side who is helping to take care of the baby.
Why? Because if you don't then it's difficult for that party to even help you, as you are saying no to whatever is said.
How about my parents then? (The other side).
Well, you will then have to strike a balance. If you feel that in certain situations the other family is saying something more logicial, as the parents, you have all rights to do things your way once in a while.
Let me cite on example for you before this post starts getting useless.
Example:
Daddy's mum say that Mummy should do confinement and not to shower or shampoo the head for 40days.
However, Mummy's mum say that she should do confinement, watch her shower and shampoo pattern, minimize it to as little as possible, but to wipe her body as she is breast feeding. It's hygiene.
In this case, Daddy should step in an give the final call.
It's your wife for god's sake! Do something!
Example:
Daddy's mum says that milk bottles (plastic type) should be placed in boiling water under the fire to sterlize before the bottle can ever be cleaned and tells you about the germs.
Mummy's mum however says that plastic bottles cannot be boiled and should just be sterlized in hot water, but not under fire.
Well, we all know that plastic are not meant to be under intense heat. That's why naglene came out with a bha or bhp bottle right. However, some older generation thinking are different.
You may have to step in to correct that.
- - -
The above are just some simple examples where arguements can happen for no specific or logical reasons!
There is no right or wrong and it's hard to strike a balance, especially when the baby is crying for milk while you are trying to think straight. Or by the time you calm yourself down, he/she decides to poo!
So try not to argue. If you do get into an arguement, try to forget it within 5mins, maximum 30mins.
- Brainwash yourself -
Everyone just wants to do their best for the baby. Nobody wants the baby to come to any harm, so everyone is trying to contribute. Stay calm, stay calm, having a baby is a happy occassion.
Cheer up. Hug your wife, tell her you are a stupid fool.
You wife will feel you are stupid and laugh at your stupidity.
Then everything is over. Everyone's happy.
Anyway i am using a glass bottle by NUK. It's great.
If you are afraid it'll break, there's even a rubber "condom" protector you can buy. Shields the heat away too.
You and your wife goes on night drives, visit the toy store on weekends and hug and cuddle each other while feeling the baby kick in her tummy.
- Face the facts, those time are over -
Usually it is never the parents who argue over how to do things.
If you read my earlier posts, both Daddy and Mummy should attend parentcraft, so both your thinking should be rather standard.
BUT HEY!
How about the grandparents? I am pretty sure both families will practise different ways of raising kids. So who should you listen to? Which technique should you adopt?
Usually i recommend that you take the technique of the side who is helping to take care of the baby.
Why? Because if you don't then it's difficult for that party to even help you, as you are saying no to whatever is said.
How about my parents then? (The other side).
Well, you will then have to strike a balance. If you feel that in certain situations the other family is saying something more logicial, as the parents, you have all rights to do things your way once in a while.
Let me cite on example for you before this post starts getting useless.
Example:
Daddy's mum say that Mummy should do confinement and not to shower or shampoo the head for 40days.
However, Mummy's mum say that she should do confinement, watch her shower and shampoo pattern, minimize it to as little as possible, but to wipe her body as she is breast feeding. It's hygiene.
In this case, Daddy should step in an give the final call.
It's your wife for god's sake! Do something!
Example:
Daddy's mum says that milk bottles (plastic type) should be placed in boiling water under the fire to sterlize before the bottle can ever be cleaned and tells you about the germs.
Mummy's mum however says that plastic bottles cannot be boiled and should just be sterlized in hot water, but not under fire.
Well, we all know that plastic are not meant to be under intense heat. That's why naglene came out with a bha or bhp bottle right. However, some older generation thinking are different.
You may have to step in to correct that.
- - -
The above are just some simple examples where arguements can happen for no specific or logical reasons!
There is no right or wrong and it's hard to strike a balance, especially when the baby is crying for milk while you are trying to think straight. Or by the time you calm yourself down, he/she decides to poo!
So try not to argue. If you do get into an arguement, try to forget it within 5mins, maximum 30mins.
- Brainwash yourself -
Everyone just wants to do their best for the baby. Nobody wants the baby to come to any harm, so everyone is trying to contribute. Stay calm, stay calm, having a baby is a happy occassion.
Cheer up. Hug your wife, tell her you are a stupid fool.
You wife will feel you are stupid and laugh at your stupidity.
Then everything is over. Everyone's happy.
Anyway i am using a glass bottle by NUK. It's great.
If you are afraid it'll break, there's even a rubber "condom" protector you can buy. Shields the heat away too.
Issues - Running Nose / Mucus
Your baby is breathing deeply.
When he/she sleeps she snores or create a funny noise.
You know that the nose is blocked by mucus.
This is a problem. Mucus not only disturb their sleep, but they are also a pain during feeding.
Imagine you having running nose and having to suck on a breast or bottle. It's tough.
- Buy a nose cleaner -
I am using the pigeon brand. Very very effective. It's quite cheap to own one too.
The rubber head of the cleaner is soft and small.
To use it, depress the ball at the back of the cleaner. Test the "power" of the suction on your hands so you know the strength to let go when putting it in your baby's nose.
You do not need to push all the way in to suck out the mucus. Place the cleaner into the nose, just a little and release slowly. The idea is to slowly draw out the mucus. After 3,4 attempts, you should be drawing out some watery mucus. The nose cleaner will produce a sucking sound, sort of the sound u hear when you are finishing a packet of Yeo's drink.
That is when you know the mucus is coming out. It usually comes out as a whole, so keep the process going and very soon, you will wonder how come there can be so much mucus in a baby's nose.
- Buy a baby plastic pincer -
When he/she sleeps she snores or create a funny noise.
You know that the nose is blocked by mucus.
This is a problem. Mucus not only disturb their sleep, but they are also a pain during feeding.
Imagine you having running nose and having to suck on a breast or bottle. It's tough.
- Buy a nose cleaner -
I am using the pigeon brand. Very very effective. It's quite cheap to own one too.
The rubber head of the cleaner is soft and small.
To use it, depress the ball at the back of the cleaner. Test the "power" of the suction on your hands so you know the strength to let go when putting it in your baby's nose.
You do not need to push all the way in to suck out the mucus. Place the cleaner into the nose, just a little and release slowly. The idea is to slowly draw out the mucus. After 3,4 attempts, you should be drawing out some watery mucus. The nose cleaner will produce a sucking sound, sort of the sound u hear when you are finishing a packet of Yeo's drink.
That is when you know the mucus is coming out. It usually comes out as a whole, so keep the process going and very soon, you will wonder how come there can be so much mucus in a baby's nose.
- Buy a baby plastic pincer -
This is really cool. It can be used to remove hard and solidifed nose shit, or whatever you call it.
Effective and safe, cause it's plastic and it's rounded.
The combination of the 2 is awesome!
Of course, you baby is happy and sleeps soundly throughout the night.
Issues - Quantity of Formula Milk
Are you wondering how much milk, especially formula milk to give your baby?
I believe you are not alone. Every new parent face this question.
So do not feel lost.
There is a simple formula to tabulate the quantity in terms of ml for your baby.
Quantity = weight x 150 / "X" (Where X = Number of Feed per day.
Example; if your baby is 5kg and by record of last few days, he/she feed 10times a day.
So 5 x 150 / 10 = your answer.
Do note that the above may not apply to your baby. So again, if your baby is feeding more or less then the "answer", it is nothing to worry about. Every baby is different, have different appetite.
Some are big eaters, some small eaters.
The general rule of thumb is that, for babies around 1mth old, they take 700ml of formula milk a day. In the case of you supplementing it with breast milk, they will still take around the same amount as breast milk are more diluted.
There are also growth spurts where your baby's demand for milk goes on overdrive.
They may be drinking 70ml every feed but suddenly they need more and cry after 70ml.
If this happen over a few feed, prepare a little more. 100ml.
They will probably be able to finish it and sleep well after that. This spurt can last around 5-6days and things goes back to normal.
The feed will end up something like 80 or 85ml.
They are unable to consume 100ml anymore. This is normal.
Feeding time also varies for babies 1 - 2 months. Some babies feed every 1hour. Some every 2hours. There is no chance of over feeding your baby. The worst that can happen is they will vomit it out. But that is quite rare and unless you force him/her to drink. If they refuse by pushing the bottle away with their tounge. They had enough. Stop feeding.
You may wonder why i keep taking example of 1month - 2 month old babies feeding pattern.
Well that's because by that time your cross this period.
You should have a good feel of what to do
I believe you are not alone. Every new parent face this question.
So do not feel lost.
There is a simple formula to tabulate the quantity in terms of ml for your baby.
Quantity = weight x 150 / "X" (Where X = Number of Feed per day.
Example; if your baby is 5kg and by record of last few days, he/she feed 10times a day.
So 5 x 150 / 10 = your answer.
Do note that the above may not apply to your baby. So again, if your baby is feeding more or less then the "answer", it is nothing to worry about. Every baby is different, have different appetite.
Some are big eaters, some small eaters.
The general rule of thumb is that, for babies around 1mth old, they take 700ml of formula milk a day. In the case of you supplementing it with breast milk, they will still take around the same amount as breast milk are more diluted.
There are also growth spurts where your baby's demand for milk goes on overdrive.
They may be drinking 70ml every feed but suddenly they need more and cry after 70ml.
If this happen over a few feed, prepare a little more. 100ml.
They will probably be able to finish it and sleep well after that. This spurt can last around 5-6days and things goes back to normal.
The feed will end up something like 80 or 85ml.
They are unable to consume 100ml anymore. This is normal.
Feeding time also varies for babies 1 - 2 months. Some babies feed every 1hour. Some every 2hours. There is no chance of over feeding your baby. The worst that can happen is they will vomit it out. But that is quite rare and unless you force him/her to drink. If they refuse by pushing the bottle away with their tounge. They had enough. Stop feeding.
You may wonder why i keep taking example of 1month - 2 month old babies feeding pattern.
Well that's because by that time your cross this period.
You should have a good feel of what to do
Friday, October 9, 2009
Confinement - Good To Have
It's tough time for Mummy. But here's a few god send items you may wish to buy.
- Buy Korlene Dry Shampoo -
- Buy Silk front button sleeping gown -
- Cut your hair short, above the shoulders or keep it long so you can bundle it up -
- But the "magic pink thing" that you can hold your fringe back without clipping from Watsons -
- Buy Korlene Dry Shampoo -
- Buy Silk front button sleeping gown -
- Cut your hair short, above the shoulders or keep it long so you can bundle it up -
- But the "magic pink thing" that you can hold your fringe back without clipping from Watsons -
Confinement
- Beginning of Confinement -
Yes, this states the start of Mummy's confinement.
Watch what you eat, do not shower often and importanly, do not wash your hair.
You may think, Yeeewww... that's so dirty. You may think it's a myth.
So it's really up to you. Daddy, you will have to take care of Mummy for life.
Her health depands on you. Either you -
1) Allow her to shower and then later in life she aches.
2) Control and space her shower so she remains healthy.
It is stupid not to bathe and shampoo the hair. But do it in moderation. Use only warm water. Best if it's herbal water. Do not shower for the first 2 weeks. Wipe your body with a towel. Wash your hair once every 2 weeks if possible.
Turn on the aircon at 26 and above. Do not use the fan.
Do not drink plain water, drink the "red rice" water i mentioned earlier.
Have your wife eat a lot of fish, papaya soup and fresh meat.
It's a belief that after pregnancy, the women have a change to "reboot" her system.
To erase all past records and be healthy again. Again, its up to you to believe it or not.
Confinement actually last for 40days.
But nowadays, it last for just 30days.
In times like this, Daddy should never say that the wife is smelly or wish to sleep somewhere else. Go through it with her like a man and accept the diffuculties your wife is facing. She feels worst then you, that's for sure.
A good indicator that the confinement is over when Mummy feels heaty.
During confinement, the food are all "heaty food". Because the body is able to take it.
But once the period is over, the body is unable to recieve such heaty food and Mummy will feel it. This then marks the end of your confinement.
A good point to note is to shower and shampoo your hair before the baby shower.
Yes, this states the start of Mummy's confinement.
Watch what you eat, do not shower often and importanly, do not wash your hair.
You may think, Yeeewww... that's so dirty. You may think it's a myth.
So it's really up to you. Daddy, you will have to take care of Mummy for life.
Her health depands on you. Either you -
1) Allow her to shower and then later in life she aches.
2) Control and space her shower so she remains healthy.
It is stupid not to bathe and shampoo the hair. But do it in moderation. Use only warm water. Best if it's herbal water. Do not shower for the first 2 weeks. Wipe your body with a towel. Wash your hair once every 2 weeks if possible.
Turn on the aircon at 26 and above. Do not use the fan.
Do not drink plain water, drink the "red rice" water i mentioned earlier.
Have your wife eat a lot of fish, papaya soup and fresh meat.
It's a belief that after pregnancy, the women have a change to "reboot" her system.
To erase all past records and be healthy again. Again, its up to you to believe it or not.
Confinement actually last for 40days.
But nowadays, it last for just 30days.
In times like this, Daddy should never say that the wife is smelly or wish to sleep somewhere else. Go through it with her like a man and accept the diffuculties your wife is facing. She feels worst then you, that's for sure.
A good indicator that the confinement is over when Mummy feels heaty.
During confinement, the food are all "heaty food". Because the body is able to take it.
But once the period is over, the body is unable to recieve such heaty food and Mummy will feel it. This then marks the end of your confinement.
A good point to note is to shower and shampoo your hair before the baby shower.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Delivery - 3/4days in Hospital
Okay. So you are ready to go.
- Time to give birth! -
Your baby is well engaged, your water bag burst
OR
You are having a C-section and the day is today.
You admit to the hospital and in my case a C-Section (Sorry, no experience in natural delivery).
The nurse will ward you, shave your wife's pubic hair, change her into an operating gown.
Don't worry, the nurses done it thousands of time. Let them do their job.
Do not argue with the nurses. They will take care of you guys later. Make friends.
- Delivery -
So if Daddy chooses to witness the event, get your camera ready, change into a clean suit for safety reasons, wear a head dress, wear a mask and go right in.
The operation takes less then 5mins to have the baby out in a jiffy.
Baby should come our crying. If he/she does not, doctor will spank them.
The baby have to cry to take a good and deep breath. It's good for them.
Do not scold the doctor or attempt to stop them.
They are professionals.
- Take tons of pictures. You are now a parent. Congrats! -
As it is a C-Section, the gynae will have to stitch up your wife.
You will leave the OP-T with your baby. Look after the baby.
The nurse will now warm the baby up. There may be a few babies lined up.
Look after your baby. The nurse will label it. So no worries mixing it up.
But read the card carefully. See that all details are correct. These details will go into the baby's health booklet later on.
Nurse will check weight, height. Take note of the measurements and ensure it tally with the card.
Count the fingers and toes. Check the vital organ.
Clear.
The nurse will now move the baby into the nursery.
They will be cleaned up and assessed based on their internal criteria. If the baby pass the test, they can be pushed out to Mummy's ward in 2-3hours time.
If not, do not argue with the nurse to see your child. It is best to allow them to recover and be well treated.
After 1hour from birth, your wife will return to her ward. If she have had epidural.
One side effect of that is that she will feel extremely cold. Cover her up, she will shiver like crazy.
One effective way is to cover her shoulders and ears with a blanket or the jacket that your brought in your bag.
Do not bother to cover the body. Ears and shoulders covered, she will feel the heat almost immediatly. Remember this point. It will be very useful and you will thank me like mad on this.
The baby will be pushed out to you soon and first thing to do is to breast feed the baby.
Mummy will have no milk.
But feed it anyway. Your breast will produce this white, erm i don't know what. Which is good for the baby.
The nurse will push the baby to you every 4 hour interval to feed the baby, if you are on total breast feeding.
Other then that, you can request to have the baby in your ward.
They are fun, and nice to carry.
Enjoy.
- Time to give birth! -
Your baby is well engaged, your water bag burst
OR
You are having a C-section and the day is today.
You admit to the hospital and in my case a C-Section (Sorry, no experience in natural delivery).
The nurse will ward you, shave your wife's pubic hair, change her into an operating gown.
Don't worry, the nurses done it thousands of time. Let them do their job.
Do not argue with the nurses. They will take care of you guys later. Make friends.
- Delivery -
So if Daddy chooses to witness the event, get your camera ready, change into a clean suit for safety reasons, wear a head dress, wear a mask and go right in.
The operation takes less then 5mins to have the baby out in a jiffy.
Baby should come our crying. If he/she does not, doctor will spank them.
The baby have to cry to take a good and deep breath. It's good for them.
Do not scold the doctor or attempt to stop them.
They are professionals.
- Take tons of pictures. You are now a parent. Congrats! -
As it is a C-Section, the gynae will have to stitch up your wife.
You will leave the OP-T with your baby. Look after the baby.
The nurse will now warm the baby up. There may be a few babies lined up.
Look after your baby. The nurse will label it. So no worries mixing it up.
But read the card carefully. See that all details are correct. These details will go into the baby's health booklet later on.
Nurse will check weight, height. Take note of the measurements and ensure it tally with the card.
Count the fingers and toes. Check the vital organ.
Clear.
The nurse will now move the baby into the nursery.
They will be cleaned up and assessed based on their internal criteria. If the baby pass the test, they can be pushed out to Mummy's ward in 2-3hours time.
If not, do not argue with the nurse to see your child. It is best to allow them to recover and be well treated.
After 1hour from birth, your wife will return to her ward. If she have had epidural.
One side effect of that is that she will feel extremely cold. Cover her up, she will shiver like crazy.
One effective way is to cover her shoulders and ears with a blanket or the jacket that your brought in your bag.
Do not bother to cover the body. Ears and shoulders covered, she will feel the heat almost immediatly. Remember this point. It will be very useful and you will thank me like mad on this.
The baby will be pushed out to you soon and first thing to do is to breast feed the baby.
Mummy will have no milk.
But feed it anyway. Your breast will produce this white, erm i don't know what. Which is good for the baby.
The nurse will push the baby to you every 4 hour interval to feed the baby, if you are on total breast feeding.
Other then that, you can request to have the baby in your ward.
They are fun, and nice to carry.
Enjoy.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)